I’m technically at work right now, but seeing as there isn’t really anything for me to do I thought it would be a nice time to write another blog entry. Nothing much has happened to me in the past few days, but something has been bothering me a little. From the title, can you guess what it is?

Oh, but it’s not that simple, trust me. You see, a few months ago I met this guy online when I signed up for a dating site. Yes, I signed up for a dating site – as a joke with a friend. It later turned into a semi-serious sort of thing though. No, it didn’t go well, however. It was horrible, in fact. I got at least 20 messages a day from either perverts, sexual deviants or horny old men and maybe one or two messages from genuinely nice people. Of those ‘nice’ people, maybe only 2 were interesting enough that I even bothered trying to meet them in person.

One of them turned out to be one of the most uncomfortable things I’ve ever sat through. For one, we had little in common. It was clear that he was quite mature for his age and quite boring too. He obviously wanted to find someone to settle down with and I am certainly not ready for that, at least not on the first date. He started talking about wanting babies already and that scared me. Not to mention, at the end of the date he leaned over and whispered, “when do I get to see you again?” while rubbing my lower back. Wtf? The date went horribly and you still think that you have a chance making that move? Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope. Nope. 

Meeting the second person was a lot better. There wasn’t a spark there and I think we both realized it, so we just talked a little and said goodbye. He hasn’t contacted me since and I haven’t contacted him since. Worked out perfect, in my opinion.

Anyways, I also met another person on this site. The thing is, he’s from Australia and he’s a total asshole. The funniest thing is though, he’s the only one I’m still talking to. Don’t get me wrong though, I’m definitely not interested in him romantically. He’s too big of a narcissist and he’s got a massive ego. He’s definitely self-centered and he is way too obnoxious for my liking. Also, he clearly said that I was too fat for him (at 120 lbs haha), way too tall for him (at 5’6″) and I’m guessing I’m not cute enough for him (*barf*). Regardless, we seem to get along well enough as ‘friends’, likely because neither one cares what the other will say. If it’s too offensive or rude, we can always just delete the other.

Honestly, he’s an okay looking dude, but his personality is something to be admired. How he has managed to date in the past is really beyond me, but hey… who am I to judge. Sometimes life doesn’t make sense (like why the heck was I single for so long and he’s had 3 gfs? Whattt?). Anyways, he started telling me of this girl he intended to meet in Indonesia. Apparently she’s pretty much met all the requirements in an ideal girl – she’s cute, tiny, small, ambitious, artistic and Asian. Not to mention, she doesn’t make him feel bad for not speaking a lick of Chinese.

So, this past month he went over to Indonesia and met up with this girl. Apparently, things went really well because as soon as I went back on Skype, he messaged me and started sending me his blog and videos of the 2 of them together. And man, those videos were so ‘cute’ that they made me want to puke. So. Much. Cheese.

In all honesty, I can’t stand the cute little Asian girl. I hate that, especially because most girls are so much more than ‘cute’, but they find the need to fake it in order to get guys. I’m sorry, but I guess I’m one of those girls that would rather be my abrasive self and find a guy that likes the real me, than have someone like me for my acting skills. Besides, I wouldn’t want to keep up the image that I’m cute for the rest of my life. I also don’t think the guy would be too impressed to find out it was all an act.

The irony is that I’m friends with a lot of these types of girls. Okay, a lot = 2 girls in particular. And it’s such an act. Because around me they’re just normal girls; they wear makeup and they dress nicely, but they also enjoy playing video games and climbing trees sometimes. Everyone has so many dimensions to themselves, why would you want to pretend that you’re only one dimensional? I wonder if that really is attractive to guys… well, if it is, I’m glad I’m not attracting those types of guys. I wouldn’t want a man that would rather deal with something simple and barely rewarding, than something complex and potentially very rewarding. This is why i can’t stand those types of guys that actively look for a “dumb” girl, because they figure that she’s easy to score with and handle in a relationship. Ultimately though, is she really that great of a prize? She is literally a dime a dozen. Would you really want to spend the rest of your life with simple, or would you rather spend your life with someone that always makes you think and question? Sure, it’s a little bit harder, but isn’t the reward greater?

Regardless, I’m a complex girl… and maybe that’s why I’ve been single for so long. Guys are getting less and less brave to attempt to crack open my secrets. I guess they’d rather settle for simple.

– L


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